John Piper | – The Disabled Wife and the Proverbs 31 Woman // Ask Pastor John


God expects faithfulness of all his people. But faithfulness for one Christian may look far different than faithfulness for another Christian.

A wife and mom in southern England writes in. She is perplexed and frustrated and it’s obvious why. “Dear Pastor John and Tony, thank you for this podcast and the ways you have approached so many topics with care and godly insight. I have been hugely helped by episode 548 (‘How Do I Honor God in Chronic Pain?’) and episode 1243 (‘I Have Chronic Fatigue — How Do I Not Waste My Life?’). These episodes directly apply to me as a disabled mother to a 2-year-old and newborn. My disability causes constant pain and significantly limits my physical activity. I am grateful for a husband who will do anything he can to reduce my burdens, although he himself has health conditions which limit his ability to physically help.

“Proverbs 31 paints a picture of a ‘vigorous’ and ‘valiant’ and ‘strong’ wife — up early, late to bed, endlessly busy inside and outside the household. When I look at this example, and at the parents in our church without my physical limitations, it is very easy to feel confused about my practical role as a wife, and anxious about investing positively in my children. Many attractive aspects of our friends’ parenting, such as homeschooling, are unlikely for us. How do I build a vision for parenting faithfully through my limitations, and deal with my guilt over the things I cannot do?”

Read or listen to this interview at our website: [support us]

Find other recent and popular Ask Pastor John episodes: [support us]

About The Author

Desiring God God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him. Learn more at desiringGod.org. Desiring God

Comment (17)

  1. What about spousal abandonment? Why would John Piper say about a husband who left his disabled wife after ten of marriage right after they purchased a home and completely ran out and from ALL maritial obligations and abandoning her for 7 months. Forcing her to work full- time despite her chronic conditions and hasn't worked for 12 years because he left the home and bills for her figure out and hasnt stent one penny to help relieve this burden after his spousal abandonment. Pastor John you always say marriage is a covenant and it's so important to keep it no matter what but what would I do in a situation like this where my husband and I obviously are not going to be able to stay married and divorce is inevitable. What would you say to a husband who commit spousal abandonment? And what would you say to a wife who is the one who was abandoned? I have emailed you this question over 10 times and nobody ever responds so please respond.

  2. Omg thank you so much for this! I have depression and sometimes I feel really sad for not doing what women in my age usually do, and listening to what pastor John said has set me free from these thoughts… God can be glorified is so many ways, including through my ill!

LEAVE YOUR COMMENT